


a man's man most abiding

by lucelafonde



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-30
Updated: 2017-10-19
Packaged: 2018-10-25 20:27:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10771818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucelafonde/pseuds/lucelafonde
Summary: When Prompto woke up that morning, he did not expect to suddenly see the obvious. Yet here he is, all-seeing.





	1. Prompto

**Author's Note:**

> Fic inspired by what must have been the most awkward moment of all the boys' lives when they were sorting through pics at the end and realised 80% of them are just Ignis and Noct looking way too close to be just friends. At least in my playthrough. (Because istg there were like 3 Ignoct pics every day when I could barely get ONE of literally ANYONE ELSE together). 
> 
> Also based on a comment Prompto made when looking at a pic of Iggy smiling that was along the lines of "I don't believe it! You're actually smiling!" as if he never does that when he's literally smiling in almost every pic I have with him (in which he's with Noct).

In Altissia, they have a lot more time to themselves. Since the city seems pretty safe, there is no reason to stick so closely together all the time, like they would in the wild. They take advantage of that.

“I’m gonna get me some ice cream,” Prompto announces, as if anyone’s gonna try and stop him. Noctis wants to go fishing. Apparently, Altissia has a lot of fish that they don't have back home, so he’s been itching for new catches since they arrived. Ignis and Gladio decide to see what’s on the market.

“ _Somebody_ has to,” Ignis says as if he isn’t grotesquely eager to explore the culinary side of the city. Gladio just wants a real steak.

“Keep out of trouble, you two,” the man says and puts them both in a headlock. “I better not have to save your asses on my day off.”

What he means, of course, is that he’ll worry himself sick while they’re apart, but that’s Gladio. Prompto can read between the lines. He and Noct struggle out of his strong grip and assure the adults that they’ll be just fiiiiine. No need to worry. They’ll stick together. Calm down.

Then Iggy and Gladio disappear and they’re left to their own devices.

“Lemme get some ice cream,” Prompto says quickly, “and then we’ll go find you a good spot.”

Noct laughs. “Calm down, there’s no rush. The fish will still be there in an hour.”

“Right.”

Noctis is more relaxed now, Prompto notices. Before coming here, he was a little nervous—no, _totally_ nervous, but it looks like actually getting to Altissia made it all go away for the most part. Maybe he was worried that they wouldn’t make it? Scared to see Luna? He doesn’t know. Anyway, it’s nice seeing him so calm for once. It hasn’t really been a fun trip ever since the news from Insomnia hit.

“Want one too?” Prompto asks in front of the cart, surveying the flavours. “Oh _maaan_ I wanna get all of them. How do I _choose?_ ”

“If Ignis were here, he’d tell you not to eat it all at once.”

Prompto laughs. “Yeah, guess you’re right.” Noct totally saw through his plan there. “So, want one?”

He looks over his shoulder at his friend, who seems thoughtful for a moment with a hand rubbing his chin and everything.

“Nah, I think I’m good. Don’t wanna ruin my appetite.”

“ _Someone’s_ confident they’re gonna catch big,” Prompto teases and orders three scoops of different flavours. Noct merely shrugs with a self-assured smile.

“I think I’ve gotten pretty good.”

“Hell yeah. I remember it as if it were yesterday,” he sighs exaggeratedly and walks away with his new treasure to find the perfect spot, “us, shivering in the cold, rain falling on my smartphone. The fearless prince, insisting that _this_ time he’s really gonna get it.”

“Hey! That only happened, like… Once. _And_ I was right!”

“I will never forget the cold touch of death…”

Noct pushes him and he laughs, quickly licking at the rim of his ice cream before it can melt all over his fingers. “You’re pretty good now,” he admits. “But _man_ have I wasted the best years of my life watching you stare at water.”

“It’s only been a few weeks. And I don’t fish _that_ much.”

“Oh, you do. You really do. What about here?” Prompto points at a spot that’s a little away from the streets people pass through, and Noct follows his hand with a curious look.

“Sure, let’s give it a try.”

So Prompto kicks back in one of the chairs that are thankfully standing around and starts eating his ice cream in earnest. Watching the prince fish is honestly boring. Pretty much _the_ most boring thing he’s ever done, and he’s done a lot of that, including dieting and working out, so he knows what he’s talking about here. Usually, he tries playing King’s Knight on his phone when Noct isn’t looking, even though Gladio always gives him the nasty eye for it, saying it will make His Royal Highness sulk and make it worse for all of them. Well, screw that. They’re friends, and friends don’t force friends to spend literal _hours_ staring at bodies of water. It’s just not done.

So he usually tries playing a game, but today he doesn’t feel like it. He takes out his camera instead and sifts through the pictures he’s taken on the road. The storage is about to run out anyway, so maybe he should delete a couple before he’s got a problem on his hands.

“Oh hey, remember that one?” he laughs and holds up the display for Noct to squint at. “Perfect timing.”

“Please delete that.”

It’s a snapshot of Noctis in mid-air after he got rammed by a really pissed off bounty hunt. He’s flailing his arms and all. It’s a piece of _art._

“No way! It’s my favourite.”

“They’re all your favourite.”

Prompto gives him a look. “Well, _duh_. That’s because they’re all awesome. Look!”

The next one is Gladio burying his massive sword into the ground, a pile of dead monsters surrounding him.

“Why’s he gotta be so photogenic?” Prompto sighs wistfully and quickly skips over one of his selfies. “Ugh, this one as well. So unfair.”

Noct briefly abandons fishing and looks over his shoulder. “Hey, this one’s pretty good. I forgot you took that.”

It’s a picture of him and Ignis in Lestallum. Noct has a hand on his shoulder and is pointing at something in the distance. Ignis is actually smiling.

“Huh.”

“What?” the prince looks at him curiously, and Prompto shakes his head.

“Nothing, I just didn’t think I’d gotten any of him smiling,” he explains. “He always looks so serious.”

Noctis frowns and takes his camera from him. “You think?”

“Er… yeah? What, you don’t think so?” Prompto stretches his upper body to see what Noct is doing and catches him quickly moving through the pictures he’s saved on their journey.

“What about this one?” Noctis asks and shows him the display. It’s another picture of them together, when Prompto caught them talking outside a diner. He’s definitely smiling here too.

“Weird.”

Noctis keeps going. “Look at this.” This one has all of them, and they all look happy, but Ignis has his hand on Noct’s shoulder and looks a bit different than the rest of them. Smiling here too.

“Yeah, I guess.” He’s growing increasingly uncomfortable, but he can’t really say why. Has he misjudged Iggy all this time? Until five minutes ago, he would have sworn that guy almost never smiled or looked happy. Not that he looked _un_ happy. Just, you know… stiff. All those pictures though… Seriously, what the hell? Is he going crazy? Blind? He has a totally different image of the guy in his head than he does on his memory card.

“This one too.” Another picture of Iggy and Noct, this time in Cape Caem. Again with the touching. Always the shoulder.

Prompto swallows hard. Somehow… he gets the feeling he shouldn’t be looking at this. It’s stupid because they aren’t even _doing_ anything, and they’ve all agreed to keep these pics together, so it’s not like… his dirty little secret or anything. But.

“Eh… Yeah. Yeah, guess you’re right. Maybe I’m just…” Noctis keeps going and there are _so many of them_. Prompto can feel himself blush, and he isn’t even _in_ those pictures. Who _is_ in them is Iggy and Noct, back to back, shoulder to shoulder, sometimes in battles, sometimes in the wilderness or Lestallum. Even in the ones with all of them in it, Iggy is standing next to Noct _every single time_ and they’re almost always touching.

How did things get so freaking awkward all of a sudden?

Not that Noctis would notice. He’s still looking at pictures, skipping over the ones without Ignis and calling out every single one of them in which he smiles. And Prompto swears, he _swears_ , he’s with Noct in _all of them_ except one, and Prompto is pretty sure he remembers him talking to Noct at the time, he’s just not in the frame.

Prompto was right about one thing: there are plenty of images in which Iggy isn’t smiling. Pretty much all the ones in which it’s just him or he’s with Gladio or Prompto. When he’s with Noct… not a chance.

He needs to sit down. Except, well, he’s already sitting, so…

“Y—you know what, I’m, er… I’m not feeling too good. M—maybe it was too much after all.” He’s ostensibly talking about the ice cream, but that’s not really what has him scrambling to take back his camera before he can say something stupid. “I think I’m gonna head back to the hotel and lie down for a bit. Wouldn’t wanna get sick around here. This city is, like, so clean.” He’s rambling, painfully, and Noct is looking at him like he’s lost his marbles, but he really needs to go. Like, _really_.

“Good luck with the fish. I believe in you!” he yells over his shoulder and makes a mad dash for freedom.

_Holy shit._

He’s leaning against a building two streets down and tries to catch his breath. Mostly, he’s just trying to sort out whatever’s going on in his brain, because _that_ is not something he was expecting to find out when he woke up this morning.

Ah yes. This morning. When he was still young and innocent and thought it’s kinda cool that Noctis grew up with his own personal butler who just happily accepts all his whims and chases after him trying to please him at every turn.

Oh what a naive blind fool he was. _Just this morning_. He needs to remind himself of that fact because it seems _unreal_ that his life has changed so drastically in the span of less than a day.

“Does he know?” Prompto wonders aloud. If it’s taken him this long to catch on, maybe he’s not the only one. That’s not a weird thought, right? He’s the one who took the pictures, after all, and _he_ didn’t notice. So maybe Noct didn’t either? Maybe he’s still the naive young child that Prompto was this morning.

Ah, to be young again. Young and carefree without any—

“Does who know what?”

His eyes snap open and he finds them staring at Gladio, who’s swung a sizeable bag over his shoulder and is looking at him with thinly veiled amusement.

“Th—the way to the hotel,” Prompto stammers quickly, glancing past the man to spot Ignis over his shoulder. Noctis doesn’t know. He can’t possibly. He would have said something, right? Right. Totally. They’re friends, so… Yeah, no way he’d have kept that a secret. But maybe Gladio…

Shaking his head, he pushes off the building and lies, “I’m not feeling so hot, so I’m heading back. Noct is still trying to conquer the seas back there.” He points over his shoulder and sure enough, Iggy’s eyes immediately follow.

_Holy. Shit._

“It’s Noct so,” he continues fast, feeling his heart race inside his chest for absolutely no reason, “I’m not sure he’s gonna find back on his own. I’m a little worried.”

“I’ll keep him company.”

Oh _maaaaaan_. Prompto wants to scream and punch the air or something, because Iggy is _totally falling for it._ It’s like he’s got him on strings like a puppet, and he can control his every move. Except, well, it’s more like… he’s _predicting_ his every move, because _boy_ is he predictable. How hasn’t he noticed before? _It’s so obvious._

“You’d really take a load off my mind,” Prompto fibs sweetly and remembers to look sick before anyone can call him on it. Gladio just grunts.

“Not to worry. We’ll find our way back.” Ignis nods at Prompto and throws his companion a telling look. “You better take Prompto back to the hotel and make sure he’s alright.”

“Sure, no problem. C’mon, Prompto, look alive.”

“S—see you later!” He quickly waves over his shoulder and tries to keep up with Gladio when the giant starts moving.

They’re already down the street when he says with amusement, “So you ate too much ice cream, huh?”

“Oh man,” Prompto laughs awkwardly, “I sure did. Who knew, huh? There was just so much of it, I couldn’t choose.”

Gladio shakes his head. “Kids.”

“Yeah…” His painfully forced laughter fades out and Prompto wonders how best to bring up what he’s just discovered. If Gladio already knows, it would be a huge weight off his chest. He really needs to talk to someone. If he doesn’t… “So, er… I was wondering.”

“Really.” Gladio throws him a quick glance. “What about?”

What about, indeed. He couldn’t just… come right out and say it, could he? _‘Did you know Iggy’s in love with Noct?’_ seems like too harsh an opener. He’s gotta ease in. Be casual.

“Have you ever met anyone who’s not normal?”

 _What._ Nonono, that isn’t what he was meaning to say _at all!_ Oh shit. This is the worst start ever. What even _is_ normal, Prompto? _He_ sure as hell isn’t. Oh, he could kick himself, really. _If only._

“I mean, someone who’s different.”

“ _You_ seem a little ‘different’ to me,” Gladio says bluntly and looks at him as if he’s grown a second head.

Prompto forces a laugh. “Haha, yeah, guess that’s true, huh.” He swallows. Well there’s no way of dropping that convo now, huh? He’s just gotta make a nice safe. “I was just thinking…”

“This oughta be good.”

“When I was in highschool, there was this guy, right…”

“A guy, huh?”

“And he was always hanging out with this other guy.”

“Are we talking about you and Noct?”

“ _What?!_ No! I mean…” Prompto trailed off. “Not… not really?”

Gladio sighs and stops walking for a sec to look at him. Prompto does _not_ like that look. It’s way too serious for what he’s just said. Like he’s looking right through him, but at _what?_

“Prompto,” he says darkly and shifts the bag over his shoulder. “Do you have a thing for His Royal Highness?”

Prompto can’t speak. For a second, all lights go out in his brain and he works on emergency power. Then he hastens to say, way too late to sound believable, “ _No!_ Of course not!”

“Uh-huh.”

“I don’t!”

“Sure.”

“I’m being serious here!”

“Right.”

He groans. It’s his own fault, really, for being an idiot and for trying to stick his nose where it doesn’t belong. He can’t let Gladio believe that’s what’s been bugging him, though. What if he tells Noctis? Or worse, _Ignis?_ No thanks. That one does _not_ strike him like the type of guy who’d accept a rival with open arms. Not that he _is_ a rival. He’s not!

“Actually,” Prompto sighs, resigned to his fate and deciding to just spit it out and accept the consequences, “I think Iggy might have a thing for Noct. I mean I’m _pretty_ sure. Ninety percent!”

Gladio snorts, chokes on his own laughter, and keeps moving.

“I’m serious! I’m not making this up!”

He’s still laughing, and Prompto thinks that reaction is seriously out of line. He wouldn’t joke about that! And he wouldn’t say it if he wasn’t certain either. Why can’t Gladio see that?

“Hey, kid,” he says, his deep voice still vibrating with amusement. “You know that’s old news, right?”

“W—wait. You mean you _knew?_ ”

“Everybody knew back home.” Gladio looks at him past his shoulder. “What, you didn’t realise Iggy’s gay? He sure ain’t subtle.”

“Well, I didn’t… _you know_.”

Gladio grunts and asks, “That a problem?”

“Of course it isn’t! I don’t care about that,” Prompto says quickly, because yeah, he realises all of that so far has come out really wrong. He doesn’t care that Iggy’s gay. In fact it’s… “I’m worried about him.”

“How come?”

“Well, I mean…” Prompto lowers his voice and feels some of the sadness he’s kept down so far resurface. “Noct has Luna, right? I don’t think he’s even noticed. I don’t want him to get hurt.”

“What, Noct or Iggy?”

Prompto glares at him. “Both! They’re our friends, right? We should do something!”

“Eh.” Gladio shrugs and grips his shoulder, forcing him to turn around and spot the very same friends among the crowd, heads stuck together in deep discussion while Ignis steers Noct gently in the right direction. They’re a little far away, but Prompto knows that smile is on his face again, like always, and he can feel himself reaching for his camera before he knows what’s happening. Gladio isn’t even looking.

“I think they’re gonna be just fine.”

 


	2. Noctis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noctis gets the wake-up call he desperately needed.

Noct is still a little confused at Prompto’s hasty escape when he pulls out his rod and throws the line into the water. It’s Prompto he’s thinking about here, so a little oddness isn’t really out of character, but still. It seemed a little… abrupt. Maybe he’s reading into it.

He tries to focus on the fish he can see swimming in the water, but his mind keeps straying to their conversation. What does Prompto mean, Ignis never smiles? Ignis smiles all the time. Maybe a little less so when they were younger and Noct was going through his rebellious phase, when his father’s condition was worsening and Noctis was forced to acknowledge for the first time that his dad was not immortal. Things were tense between them then and it made sense that Iggy wouldn’t really be all that glad to see him. But now?

He tries to think back to the beginning of their roadtrip. Has Ignis ever not smiled at him? Not that he can think of. Sure, he wasn’t thrilled when their car broke down, but which one of them was? Seriously, what the hell is Prompto talking about?

An uncomfortable thought sneaks into his mind and he wants to shake it off, but it’s persistent. Ignis is Ignis when Noct is there, but maybe… maybe he treats Prompto differently? When they’re alone? It doesn’t make sense. Prompto’s only ever said good things about Iggy, raving about his cooking and letting his envy shine about Noct having his own personal valet. Not that Noct has ever really seen Specs like that, but still. Ignis wouldn’t… be weird to him when they’re alone, right? Right. Definitely. So what the hell is Prompto talking about?

“Weird,” he mumbles and shakes his head, looking at the line in the water. He’s got proof he’s right in the photos Prompto has taken, so it can’t be anything Ignis has done. Maybe Prompto just… doesn’t like him?

No, that’s impossible.

…

Right?

Yeah, definitely impossible. Prompto’s had a crush on Iggy’s cooking ever since he first got a taste back in high school. He was eagerly waiting to have it every day as soon as he heard about the trip. He’s never been weird about Specs before.

He’s reading into it. Noct knows he’s reading into it. It’s probably nothing, he’s just being weird about an offhand comment that didn’t mean anything. That must be it because nothing else makes sense.

 _Man_ , maybe the sun here has gotten to his head.

“Still no luck?”

Noct startles and almost drops both himself and his rod into the water when Ignis appears behind his shoulder, looking amused.

“Don’t… sneak up on me like that,” he forces out and rubs his forehead. He’s a little embarrassed because he knows Iggy definitely saw him flinch, but he’s also not proud of not having caught a single thing so far. He’s been way too distracted.

“Apologies.” Ignis nods at the river. “Not getting any takers?”

“Yeah… I’m not feeling up to it today. Somehow I can’t seem to focus.”

Iggy’s eyebrows raise. “Something on your mind, Noct?” His voice lowers. “Perhaps the impending meeting?”

“What, Luna?” The prince shakes his head. “That’s not it. I just… Maybe I’m just tired.”

“Well. It _has_ been rather a few long weeks,” Ignis says kindly and squeezes his shoulder, removing tension there he hasn’t even been aware of until now. Man, no wonder he’s not catching anything. “Perhaps a break…?”

“Yeah. Let’s go. I don’t think they’re gonna bite today anyway.” Noct pulls out the line and makes the rod disappear. Then he yawns. “Wow, I’m beat. Too many nights camping.”

“I concur.”

Noct laughs and follows Ignis as he leads them back onto a more populated road. He knows his adviser is as much a city boy as he is, and neither one of them has ever warmed up to nature the way Gladio has. In this, they’re of one mind.

“We have some money now, after all those hunts we did,” Noctis says suggestively, deliberately moving closer and lowering his voice so that Ignis is forced to move in too, give him all of his attention. “Maybe we could get separate hotel rooms.”

Ignis looks at him, startled, and then laughs deeply when he understands the prince’s plan. “You would escape Gladio’s snoring for a night?”

“All of them, if I could,” Noctis confesses without a hint of guilt, “but I’ll settle for one. Prompto talks in his sleep… when he isn’t stealing the blanket.”

“Yes, I had noticed that as well.”

They share a look and smile at their private suffering as if it’s a joke. Noctis says thoughtfully, “You know, I only like sleeping with you, Specs. You act… normal.”

He really means that. Ignis is the best person to sleep with ever: he always smells good, even after they’ve been on the road for ages, he stays on his side of the bed no matter what, and he doesn’t talk or snore _or_ steal the covers. Which is why it’s usually such a hassle to pair up with him when they’re forced to share hotel beds. _Everyone_ wants to sleep with Ignis. Noctis isn’t quite as popular, but he’s not the worst offender. They switch it up to be fair to everyone, but man, being here in Altissia makes him want to just indulge for once and act spoiled. He thinks he deserves it after he’s come so far. Also, he wasn’t kidding about the money they’ve raised. They can afford a little luxury for once.

“I—thank you.”

Noct turns his head to look at Ignis, who’s definitely not looking at him now. Is he embarrassed? That’s rare. Ignis is usually pretty full of himself, and he’s earned that. Almost makes him want to tease the man, but that’s something better left to Gladio.

“Really wanna do this,” Noct presses, trying to will him into meeting his eyes again. “You in?”

Ignis clears his throat and swallows. “You mean…?”

“Think we can saddle Prompto with the big guy?” Noctis asks cheerfully. He isn’t sure how exactly the two of them would be getting any sleep together, but it’s not his problem. He’ll claim Specs now, rent the room, and let them figure it out themselves. It’s the first thing he’s insisting on since they’ve set out, and he thinks he can get away with a _little_ rank-pulling. Just once. He really needs to get some sleep, especially before seeing Luna for the first time in years. She doesn’t need to see him like… _this._

“I think we can manage that.” Ignis is still smiling, but it’s looking a little stiff, and Noctis can’t help but think back on his earlier conversation with Prompto. He’s not… faking it every time, right? Right?

Noctis stops walking and gestures for Ignis to step aside with him, away from the moving throng of people and towards the water. “You want to, right? You don’t have to agree if you don’t.”

Ignis looks surprised and tries to hide it behind the motion of adjusting his glasses. Normally, Noctis might not have paid attention, but after his talk with Prompto, he’s a little hyperaware of everything his friend does. So he notices when Iggy hesitates to answer and feels his heart plummet with the silence.

“Oh. Sorry, I— I didn’t realise.” Noctis swallows and awkwardly scratches the back of his head. “I wasn’t thinking. I’m a pretty rough sleeper too, huh?” He smiles ruefully, remembering all the nights he’s inadvertently woken up his companions by jerking awake after a nightmare or thrashing around during the worst of it. He’s probably hit them with it a couple of times too, but none of them have ever mentioned it. Maybe that’s why not even Ignis is ever tripping over himself to pair up with him. He should have realised.

“Maybe we should all get our own rooms. I think our budget could handle it for a night.”

He’s barely said the words before Ignis has grabbed his shoulder, dug his fingers into his flesh. “That won’t be necessary. It would be a pleasure to share a room with you.”

“You don’t have to force yourself,” Noct says and shrugs out of the touch he usually welcomes. “Trust me, I get it. I wouldn’t wanna sleep with me either.”

“Then it is fortunate that the choice is not yours.”

Noctis glances up at him disbelievingly, but the smile is back on Iggy’s face, looking genuine, and he doesn’t have it in himself to argue. Once the man has made up his mind, he’s impossible to deter. Nobody knows that better than him.

“You get to tell Gladio,” Noctis says instead and shirks all responsibility for this. “Then we have a deal.”

“I believe it was _your_ idea to begin with. Shouldn’t you be the one to share it?” Ignis asks, amused and clearly seeing right through him, and they continue their walk back to the hotel.

“I shared it with you.”

“Right.”

Noctis smiles, an evil, devilish smile that never means anything good, and says slowly, “If you’d rather room up with Gladio…”

“I’ll tell him.”

“You’re the best.”

Ignis sighs and pushes his glasses up his nose, looking just a little bit smug. “That I am.”

Prompto and Gladio are standing in front of the hotel when they get there, apparently waiting for them, and Noctis barely greets them before making his way inside to pay for their rooms. When he gets out, Ignis has already broken the news. That’s not what surprises Noct; of course Iggy would be that efficient. It’s the reaction of the others that makes him grow wary.

“I could use a little alone time,” Prompto is saying eagerly, tripping over his own tongue as the words bubble out. “We’ve been sharing way too much! It will be great! Just me and Gladio, Gladio and me… I might _actually_ get some sleep.”

Okay, now Noct _knows_ he’s full of shit. _No one_ actually gets some sleep around Gladio, and they all know it. What the hell is up with him today?

“What’s up with you?” he asks, a little amused at how desperately Prompto is trying to sell this. “You’re acting a little off today.”

“What, me? No way! I’m the same as always.”

Noctis crosses his arms in front of his chest and says, “Uh-huh.”

“Honest!”

“You just said you’re looking forward to sleeping with _Gladio_ ,” Noct informs him. “No way I’ll believe that.”

Prompto looks at him out of wide, startled eyes, and it does nothing to convince the prince that there _isn’t_ something going on here. Then the blond grabs Gladio’s arm and announces, “You don’t know what you’re talking about. We’re the best of friends. Right, big guy?”

His shield does not look like he thinks of Prompto as anything other than a massive nuisance at the moment, but at the smaller man’s elbowing, he sighs and says listlessly, “Yeah. The best.”

“You guys are hiding something.”

“Wh—what? _Nooo!_ ” The way Prompto says it _screams_ that he’s hit the nail on the head there, but he doubts he’ll get them to admit what it is. It’s probably something silly anyway. Maybe an embarrassing hobby? Damn, now he really wants to know.

“Leave them be,” Ignis sighs and cleans his glasses. “We should be more worried about dinner.”

“Man’s got a point,” Prompto latches on immediately.

“I could eat,” grunts Gladio.

Noctis doesn’t disagree. He’s feeling a little hungry himself, so he allows them to change the topic. It’s not like he _wants_ them to argue about the rooms anyway.

“Where do you wanna go?”

“It’s up to you, Noct,” Ignis informs him. As if they’re just trailing behind him.

Noct cocks his head and tells him, “ _You_ choose. No one knows as much about food as you, Specs.”

“I’m with Noct,” Prompto agrees merrily, and Gladio grunts. Iggy sighs and turns around to look out at the street.

“There is _one_ place I’ve been meaning to try…”

So they go and try it. It’s expensive, but they can afford it just this once, and it’s sort of a special occasion, isn’t it? He’s about to see Luna again, which is the whole purpose of this trip, and he wants the guys to enjoy themselves as well. They deserve it. After all they’ve been through for him… They can splurge a little.

They let Ignis talk them into their meal choices because none of them have any idea what the items on the menu even mean, and when they’re done with dinner, Prompto insists on heading out to take some pictures in the setting sun. For some reason he needs Gladio with him to do that. Desperately.

“He’ll help me get the perfect shot!” Prompto insists and grabs the man’s arm as he drags him off. Noctis doesn’t point out that Gladio knows absolutely nothing about photography. Maybe he just needs him as a model?

“Do you think Prompto has been acting… weird lately? Today, specifically,” Noct asks Ignis when they start making their way back to the hotel.

His friend ponders for a moment. “Perhaps. Possibly the change of scenery?”

“You think?”

They head down a narrow alley, and Noctis makes sure to stick close to Iggy the whole way. He does _not_ want to get lost here. Again. Altissia is the _worst_.

“It has been a long trip. It’s only natural that it would make us all a little stir crazy.”

Noct glances up at him. “What about you? How are you holding up?”

“Perfectly fine.” Ignis smiles a little, inclining his head. “Thank you, Noct.”

“What, nothing that’s bothering you? No complaints?” he presses, only a little teasing.

“None.”

“Nothing, huh?”

“Not at all.”

Noctis stretches his arms over his head and grimaces. “I’ve got tons.”

“Is that so.” Ignis is laughing at him, he can tell, and that makes him keep going.

“Oh yeah. First, the walking. There’s so much of it!”

“There is.”

“Then, the mud. Goes with the walking. Why is everything in nature so _dirty?_ ”

“I couldn’t say.”

“Don’t even get me started on camping. It’s fine once in a while, I guess, but we do it _way_ too much. Especially when it rains. Icky.”

“I suppose you have a point.”

“And we all know we don’t shower enough. I don’t even wanna think about it.”

“Yes, I see what you mean.”

“Ugh.” Noct sighs and ruffles his hair. “I’m not sure how I feel about Altissia, but at least it’s a _city_. I don’t think I could deal with one more night outside.”

“You have been very strong,” Ignis says solemnly and draws him close by his shoulder, as if he’s comforting a kid. “We’re all very proud of you.”

“Thanks.” Noct wiggles out from under his arm and points down a street. “Let’s go this way. We might be able to see the water.”

Ignis looks at him oddly. “As you wish.”

They walk, side by side, and Noctis hopes Iggy won’t be able to tell that his heart is racing comically inside his chest. They were just fooling around like always, it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, but when Ignis touched him back there, somehow it made his pulse spike. He can’t really explain it, so he hopes it will never come up and tries to distract himself with the sights of the city.

“Oh, wait.” He comes to an abrupt halt and turns towards one of the glass fronts among the buildings.

Ignis stops next to him, close enough for their shoulders to touch, and says softly, “Lady Lunafreya’s wedding dress.”

They’ve seen it before once, when they were still trying to get to know the city, but somehow the mood is different now. It’s just him and Iggy, and the crowd of people that was there the first time has gone as well. It’s probably too late in the day to go looking at dresses, Noct thinks, or maybe everyone’s already seen it. It’s hard to say.

“It looks really good,” he hears himself murmur, slowly moving closer to the display. He tries to imagine himself standing next to it, in a proper suit. Somehow he can’t really make it work.

“That it does. I’m sure she would have made a stunning bride.”

“Yeah…”

He has no problems imagining that. Luna has always been beautiful in his eyes, and even though they haven’t seen each other in person for so long, he’s seen pictures. He knows she’s still as radiant as ever. The most beautiful woman alive. And she was supposed to be his wife before everything went to hell.

“Not sure about her husband, though,” he jokes, looking at Ignis to lighten the mood.

It doesn’t work. His companion looks serious, still intensely staring at the dress, and tells him in no uncertain terms, “I disagree.”

“Really.” Noct crosses his arms in front of his chest and takes the bait.

“Yes. You would have made a stunning husband yourself, Noct. And who knows… Perhaps you might yet.”

There’s something weird about Ignis, Noct decides, when he talks like that. Like he’s trying to sound like his father would have, all proud and encouraging, but he can’t quite get the tone right. Which means, of course, he’s faking it, because Ignis has never had trouble getting the tone right. He’s always made an excellent stand-in for his father. As if that’s what he’s been born to do. He’s so good at it, in fact, that it’s often made Noctis angry in his youth, when all he wanted was his _real_ father to be his dad and Ignis to be his _friend_ , not the nagging voice in the back of his head that refused to shut off.

He thought they’re over that, but maybe not. Anyway, he’s an adult now, and he knows his dad won’t come back. What he wants, what he _needs_ , is a friend who understands that. Someone he can talk to. So he says, “I don’t think I’m cut out for marriage.”

“What makes you say that?” Ignis looks surprised, and Noctis just shrugs.

“Dunno. Just doesn’t feel right.”

“That’s probably the nerves talking.”

“I don’t think so.”

Iggy is quiet for a moment, watching Noct stare blankly at the dress. “You weren’t looking forward to the wedding?”

The question is so cautious, he almost misses it. He doesn’t, though, and ponders it for a moment, trying to sort out his feelings.

“Not really,” he admits. It’s not like he was _not_ looking forward to it, it’s more like… “I just… wasn’t as excited as I should have been, I think.” This is hard to fess up to. He can’t even imagine telling anyone but Ignis about this, but if he can’t tell _him_ , then who can he tell? Iggy knows everything. Things that Prompto and Gladio wouldn’t even _believe_ about him, Iggy knows for a fact. Keeping secrets from him is somehow unnatural.

“I… don’t know what to say.”

Noctis shakes his head. He doesn’t need to say anything. He doesn’t need to hear anything he has to say. What Noct needs is someone to listen.

“I love Luna,” he says with conviction. “She’s a good friend. I just… I don’t love her—like that.”

Ignis doesn’t say anything, and Noct can tell from their reflection in the glass that he isn’t looking at him either. Maybe that was too much to confess to.

His friend clears his throat and asks cautiously, “Is there… someone else…?”

Noctis draws a hand over his face and turns away, doesn’t want to look at the dress anymore.

“You know… No one’s asked me that even _once_ since this whole mess started.”

“I—“ Ignis breaks off, clearly taken aback. Then he continues, softer, “Yes, I believe you’re right.”

They both know he is. No one asked him. No one cared. Noctis wasn’t upset about it or anything, and he didn’t throw a fit when they told him about Luna. He understood then what he understands now: it was supposed to be a political marriage that would help people. His personal feelings weren’t important. If anyone _had_ asked him back then, he would have told them it doesn’t matter, regardless of his answer.

He’s not angry—just surprised that Ignis is thinking of this _now_. Of everyone in his life, he kinda figured that Ignis would be the first—no, the _only_ one to actually care about what _he_ thinks, what _he_ wants, regardless of whether it’s feasible or not. Gladio’s own life is bound to duty, so of course he never questioned what Noct himself must do, and Prompto has been a fan of Luna longer than they’ve been friends, so he was busy fawning over her instead of asking about his feelings. But Ignis…

“How come you’ve never asked me?” he wonders aloud, not sure he wants to hear the answer, and he sees his adviser open and close his mouth out of the corner of his eye. No words come out.

“I suppose I just assumed you would be thrilled with the arrangement,” he confesses at last, sounding defeated, “given your previous relationship with Lady Lunafreya.”

“Mhm.” Noct hums thoughtfully and turns to leave. He barely manages to take a step before an iron grip closes around his wrist and holds him in place. “Ignis?” He looks down at their hands and up at his companion, who’s looking rather pallid.

“You haven’t answered the question.”

“What question?”

Ignis swallows, and Noctis notices a wild glint in his eyes he’s never seen there before. He gets the feeling that he’s moving in dangerous waters, that he should slip away and shrug the whole conversation off, but somehow he can’t seem to do it. He’s standing, rooted to the spot, when Ignis repeats, “Is there someone else?”

“Your hand…” Noctis tries to tell him that he’s seriously cutting off his blood flow but falls silent when the grip only tightens in response. “I—“ He thinks back to Insomnia, to everything he left behind. Their journey on the road. His time back home feels like a dream now, like nothing about it was ever real. How can Ignis even ask him that?

“No. There isn’t.”

The hand drops slackly from his wrist.

“If there had been,” Noct continues, looking past Ignis at a little table down the street, “I would have married her anyway.”

“Yes, of course. I… apologise. It was out of turn.”

Noct nods because he doesn’t know what else to say. He’s not angry, but Ignis won’t look at him, and he’s feeling too awkward himself to try and lighten the mood. He says the only thing he can think of, which is, “We should head back,” and then they do that. In complete silence. The whole way.

Being silent around Ignis has never been awkward before. Noct has spent the better part of his teens brooding alone in his apartment when he wasn’t out with Prompto, and it was never uncomfortable when Ignis joined him there. He never tried to make him talk either. It was just… natural. On the road, too, Noctis could spend _hours_ on end not saying a thing and he still felt like Ignis knew what he’s thinking every second of it. So why is he feeling like this now? Like something is… missing, or wrong.

They get up to their room and Noct showers first just to have something to do. When he gets out, Ignis disappears into the bathroom behind him. At this point, Noctis is convinced he’s being avoided, and he can’t say he doesn’t understand why. Well, he _doesn’t,_ not exactly, but the awkward energy between them is reason enough. He just doesn’t know where it’s coming from.

Ignis has always been a little stiff when it comes to Luna. It’s not a shocking new development. Noctis isn’t surprised that his friend isn’t singing her praises and trying to question him about every little detail about her, like Prompto. He’s not sure where it stems from, but his childhood friend has always been something of a sore topic for Iggy. Even so, he’s always been polite about it. Noctis doesn’t think he _dislikes_ her. Whenever Ignis _does_ talk about her, it’s only to say kind and respectful things. It’s not like he hates her, he just… doesn’t want to hear about her. Ever.

Noctis thinks maybe he knows why.

The thing is, Noctis knows his friend is gay. He’s known since they were teenagers. Although people have accused him time and again of only caring about himself, even Noctis couldn’t escape the relentless rumours floating around the palace. It wasn’t just Ignis; everyone who worked there got talked about. Ignis just stood out because he was so close to the prince, to him, so people took a special interest much like they did in Noctis himself. It wasn’t really a big deal, so when the rumour mill started working on his adviser and he heard rumblings that he’s been spotted with other boys, Noctis couldn’t really be made to care. Someone in the Crownsguard asked him once if he wasn’t disgusted having someone like that get so close to him. Noctis politely punched him in the face.

They haven’t talked about it and Ignis hasn’t said anything to him directly, but Noctis assumed that he knew back then, and that was that. Things continued as before. Noctis tried to open his adviser’s schedule a little more so he could go have fun with his boyfriends or whatever and Ignis still ended up coming over every day. Nothing changed.

Still, Noctis thinks, maybe it’s been bothering him this whole time. Maybe he’s… jealous that other people have it so easy. That Noctis has had someone everyone’s always been approving of when he himself had to sneak around and _still_ got ostracised for something so small and stupid. Maybe he’s just angry that other people have it so easy. Noctis can’t blame him if he is.

Ignis comes out of the bathroom, looking as put together as ever, and Noctis decides to have the conversation that is long overdue.

“Ignis…”

He looks up at him briefly on his way to the bed, sitting cautiously on the edge to face his prince in the opposite chair. “Something on your mind, Noct?”

“I need to ask you something.”

“Sounds serious.” He’s joking, but Noctis can tell he’s tense by his rigid shoulders, the way his face twitches a little. They’ve known each other so long, it’s easy to read what they’re thinking, and Noct is scared for a moment that Ignis can see through him as well right now, can see right into his heart and expose him for the coward he is.

“I guess it does,” he admits solemnly and pulls the wet hair out of his face to look at his friend. “How long have you known you like guys?”

Whatever Ignis has been expecting to hear, this is clearly not it. He looks thrown for a second, like he’s forgotten how to breathe, and then his fingers dig into the covers beneath him hard enough to make his knuckles turn white.

“Highness…”

“I’ve known for a while now,” Noctis tells him before he can bother denying it. “What about you?”

“I—About ten years now,” Ignis confesses quietly, looking at the floor between them.

Noctis laughs breathlessly. “Wow. Maybe not that long a while then.” He’s only known for… what, three, four years maybe? Somehow it seems unbelievable that Ignis has been keeping a secret from him for that long. That there have been six years in which Noctis has been completely clueless about such a big part of his closest friend’s life. How could he not have noticed? Was he really always that preoccupied with himself? That he didn’t even notice _that?_

He suddenly feels incredibly guilty. He remembers all the times he’s gushed about Luna when she wrote back in their journal, when Ignis cleaned up after him and made sure it stayed safe. He’s always had Ignis to talk to about that stuff, and he’s never even wondered if Ignis had anyone to talk about _his_ stuff with. No wonder he’s been mad all these years. Noctis can’t even imagine how frustrated he must have been.

“I’m sorry.”

Ignis lifts his eyebrows, surprised. “Whatever for?”

“I’m… I’m sorry.” Noct swallows. He feels like the worst friend in Eos. “I should have paid more attention. I should have… asked you.” Releasing a shaky breath, he hides his face behind a hand and slumps in his chair. “Guess Gladio’s right. I really am a selfish brat.”

“That is not true,” Ignis says softly. Noctis is too scared to look at him right now. He doesn’t want to see disappointment. “I… I didn’t want you to know. I’d hoped you hadn’t been made aware of it. I— I was keeping it from you, Noct. Don’t blame yourself for not seeing what I was so desperate to hide.”

The prince drops his hand and stares at the ceiling. “Why?”

“Why was I trying to hide it?”

“Yes.” Noct straightens in his chair and looks at Ignis, catches the rueful smile on his face when their eyes meet.

“Because I am in love with you,” he says simply, freezing Noctis on the spot, “I have been for as long as I remember. I was afraid once you knew that I was… like _that_ , it was only a matter of time until you realised.”

“Y—you…”

“I didn’t want you to know,” Ignis continues mercilessly, apparently intent on sharing everything he’s hidden for the last ten years all in one go now. “Because I didn’t want you to turn me away, or treat me any differently. I would never have acted on it, of course, as I believe my record proves, so I saw no reason to mention it. It would only have complicated things and—“

He’s looking at Noct out of warm, sad eyes, and Noct can feel his own grow moist, maybe because he hasn’t blinked or otherwise moved in a while. He’s staring at Ignis as if he’s under a spell, as if nothing could possibly make him look away, and he feels his own fingers dig into his armrests until it’s painful.

“This is rather hard to admit, but… I was afraid you’d turn me down before I’d even had a chance to prove myself. I was nothing but a child myself at the time,” Ignis explains. “It all seemed rather terrifying in my head. As it turns out, I was right. It’s quite nerve-wracking.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” Noctis murmurs, the wind knocked out of him.

“Thoughts?”

Noct huffs breathlessly, tries to get his mouth to move and say something profound and reassuring. What comes out is, “Guess you really _were_ jealous of Luna.”

“Shamefully so.”

He can’t help but laugh then, the tension clearly having gotten to his head, and he thinks he catches even Ignis crack a smile. “Oh man… I just thought you were mad because I didn’t have to hide her like you did all your boyfriends.”

“ _Boyfriends?_ ” Ignis raises a cool eyebrow. “I think not.”

“What, you didn’t have boyfriends?”

Ignis crosses his arms in front of his chest and looks at Noctis, amused. “And when would I have found the time for that? _You_ kept me quite busy.”

“Your _hobby_ kept you busy,” the prince points out, because he really _did_ try to get Iggy to spend more time on other things and the man never did. “So, what, all those guys people saw you with…”

“Distractions,” Iggy waves off. “I told you, I wasn’t interested in them. I was in love with you. I thought maybe if I was keeping myself busy, it would go away.” He looks meaningfully into his eyes. “It didn’t.”

Noct swallows. “This is… a lot to take in.”

“I imagine it is.”

“Does anyone else know?”

Ignis smiles indulgently. “Which part?”

“That you…” He trails off. Somehow it’s impossible to say it out loud. He has no idea how Iggy did it. Just the thought of it makes his heart leap into his throat and block all words from coming out.

Iggy sighs and draws a hand through his wet hair. “Gladio knows. He asked me when he caught wind of an affair I’d had with one of the Kingsglaive.”

“ _Asked you?_ ” Noct sounds disbelieving.

“Oh yes.” Ignis smirks. “He came up to me, pushed me against the nearest wall, and made me say it. It was quite mortifying.”

“I think lots of people knew…” Noct mumbles. “But I meant—“

“I know what you meant. Gladio connected the dots. It… wasn’t hard to figure out.” Ignis exhales loudly and reaches for his glasses. He’s rubbing them clean on his shirt when he continues, “He told me to get over it or be more subtle. As I was incapable of the former, I decided on the latter. Apparently, it worked.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t see it.”

He feels so stupid. All these years, and he just… thought that’s how things were. The way Iggy treated him, the things he did for him, all of it, without a single complaint… He’s always taken it for granted, he knows that, and he’s never questioned any of it, but now it feels…

“Hey, Ignis?”

“Hmm?” He places the glasses back on his nose and Noct swallows. His heart is racing a thousand miles an hour, and he thinks maybe now he gets how Ignis must have felt a few minutes ago, but he needs to get this out before his courage leaves him and he’ll never manage to say it again.

“How did you… how did you _know?_ ”

“Which part?”

Noct laughs humourlessly. “Any of it. How did you… know that that’s not normal? That that’s not how everyone sees things?”

“A rather complicated question with an even _more_ complicated answer, I’m afraid.”

“We’ve been friends since we were kids,” Noct presses. “How did you know that you… that you don’t just like me as a friend? Or a brother?”

Ignis tilts his head rather smugly and says, “Well, for one thing, I don’t usually feel the urge to kiss my brothers.”

“But you want to kiss _me_.” It’s not a question. His voice just wavers a little at the end because he still can’t really wrap his head around it.

“Would you be offended if I said yes?”

“I—no, of course not.”

“Then yes. I would like that very much.”

This isn’t happening. Just an hour ago, the world was still normal. Everything was as it should be. Ignis was a dear friend who’s always been by his side and always would be, and Luna was his future bride, politics or not. How did it all suddenly get tilted on its head?

“I can’t believe you’ve been keeping that to yourself all these years.”

“Turns out it’s quite simple when you don’t have a choice,” Ignis says curtly. “May I ask why the sudden interest? Or would that be prying?”

That’s a little underhanded and they both know it. After everything Noctis has made him spill just now, how can he shoot down _any_ question?

“I don’t know,” Noctis confesses at last. “Nothing makes sense anymore.”

“Are you that surprised?”

“No. No, I guess not.” It’s not that it’s overly shocking. Thinking about it, the only surprising thing about it is that it took Noctis this long to figure it out. What’s doing his head in is something else, something he previously hasn’t thought about. Something that maybe he _should_ think about. So he’s honest when he tells Ignis, “I’ve never thought about it, but… Luna.” Ignis flinches a little, and Noct swallows past the lump in his throat. “I never wanted to kiss Luna.”

“You haven’t seen her in a long time,” Ignis points out, and yes, that is exactly how Noct used to think about it. It’s the distance, it will happen when you see her, you’ll get excited. And telling himself he’s not interested in any other girls because he’s already got Luna and he prefers spending time with Prompto to dating. He doesn’t want people talking about him. Doesn’t want to drag anyone else into this.

All those things he told himself, but now he’s not so sure any of them were ever true. He loves Luna and he’s looking forward to seeing her again. He misses her. But he doesn’t want to kiss her, and he doesn’t want to get married either. And if he thinks about it, honestly, he doesn’t want Ignis to leave should that ever happen. If he thinks about it, he doesn’t want to marry _anyone_ if it will make Ignis leave.

He doesn’t feel that way about Prompto. He doesn’t feel that way about Gladio either. But he’s always felt that way about Ignis.

Maybe he’s just been telling himself it’s normal for the two of them because that is how they’ve always been, but Noctis knows he doesn’t see Iggy the way he sees the others. He never has. He can’t believe he’s never realised why.

Before he knows it, he’s standing from his seat and looking down at Ignis, who seems surprised at the sudden movement but doesn’t flinch away. They look at each other wordlessly for a moment and then Noctis takes a step closer, two, and comes to stop in front of him, saying, “That’s not it.”

Then he leans down and presses their lips together. He’s pretty sure he hears Iggy choke.

“W—“ He doesn’t quite manage to force out a word before Noctis has his arms slung around his shoulders and is slipping into his lap, silencing him with another kiss. He’s scared to stop now, because if he stops, maybe he’ll think about it and decide he was wrong. That he’s made a mistake. And he doesn’t want this to be a mistake. He doesn’t want to look Ignis in the eye when he realises. So he doesn’t give them the chance.

Iggy slowly lifts his arms and wraps them around his back, cautiously tugging the prince close when he hasn’t made a move to jump up after a few seconds. Noctis shudders at the sensation. It’s weird. They’ve touched so many times before, in so many different ways, and it’s never felt like this. Like his whole body is on fire, tingling where they come into contact. His heart is going to explode.

“Fuck.” He draws away and takes a deep breath, his lungs burning more than they should after the brief kiss, and leans his head against Iggy’s shoulder.

“If you’d like.”

He retreats, wide-eyed, and stares at Ignis. Is he serious?

“Relax. It was a joke.”

“Sorry, I’m…”

“I know. I understand.” Ignis rubs soothingly over his back. “All in your own time, Noct.”

The prince laughs soundlessly. He thinks they’re doing this again? Doing… more?

“Yeah.” He’s not saying no, though, and he doesn’t want to either. He’s not sure he can call this… what Ignis said yet, but he knows he doesn’t want to go back. And he doesn’t want to lose Ignis. Ever. He smiles a little, settling into the embrace as Iggy continues to stroke his back. “Guess asking for that separate room was a good call.”

“One that very nearly killed me.”

Noctis perks up curiously. “Really?”

“You have no idea.”

“Huh. Guess I don’t.” Although he _has_ been looking forward to this as well. Perhaps not in quite the same way, but… “Might as well make use of it while we have the chance.”

“Do you have something in mind?”

“Maybe.”

 


	3. Ignis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this lying around in my drafts so here it is.

Ignis doesn’t know what to think. Actually, he’s quite certain he was rendered incapable of thought entirely when Noctis slipped into his lap and pressed their lips together. He most assuredly hasn’t used his brain for even a moment after that.

“Noct…”

“Don’t stop me.”

Ignis rolls his head back and sends a silent prayer to the Gods, who he sincerely hopes aren’t watching in this very moment. _Stop him? How?_ Could he reach down and force Noct’s hands away from his waistband, tell him to wait and take it slow? Perhaps. If there is a way, he can’t find it. It’s shamefully difficult for him to see much of anything right now, his face buried beneath his arm as he tries to control his breathing.

“I… won’t,” he promises weakly, none of his concerns or suggestions forming on his lips when he feels the prince’s warm touch on his hips.

“That’s good then.”

Ignis shudders when a hand slips beneath his pyjama bottoms. His heart skips a beat entirely when something solid closes around his quickly filling erection.

“Man, this feels weird.”

Ignis wants to say ‘ _You think?’_ and distract himself from the sensation, but nothing will come out. He’s too focused on the feeling of a shaking hand around his dick, squeezing experimentally in a way that is entirely unskilled and unknowledgeable, and more than enough to make him spill in his pants like a teenager if he’s not careful.

“Don’t… force yourself.”

Noctis twists his grip in punishment and Ignis bites back a groan. “I’m not. I want to try this.”

He has _no_ idea how they went from _‘maybe I don’t like girls the way I should’_ to _‘I want to hold your cock and suck it maybe’_. Somehow he gets the impression that he missed a vital step in this conversation.

Noctis manages to pull his pants down while Ignis is distracted asking himself where he went wrong. Then he’s clearly staring at his dick.

“Not exactly something you’re used to, is it?” he asks knowingly, lifting his arm from his face to look at Noct.

“I—“ The prince breaks off, clearly embarrassed, and averts his eyes. Ignis can imagine quite well what he must be going through at this moment. He’s been in this position himself, years ago, when he had no idea what to do, how to act, or what he wanted. The first time, as he remembers, was so nerve-wracking, he ended up not enjoying it at all. It was so bad, in fact, that he thought for a while he had misjudged his own desires, and that perhaps women were the thing for him after all. Thankfully, he never finished with that train of thought, but he doesn’t know how Noctis is going to deal with this.

Not that he can force the issue either way. All he can do is lend an open ear and try to guide him through the worst of it. How he feels about it, only the prince himself can decide.

“I’ve never…” Noct gestures vaguely down at him lying on the bed. “You know.”

“I assumed.”

Noctis sighs and admits, “I don’t know what to do.”

Of course he doesn’t. He hasn’t given this matter _any_ thought at all, and it’s been bugging Ignis since they started. This isn’t exactly something one should simply _stumble into_. It took himself several months of agonising soul searching before he finally decided on taking someone up on their offer, and then only after he’d done a fair amount of research on the matter. He daresay Noctis has little to no idea about how intimacy between men is done. He’s simply never had the interest.

 _Until now_ , Ignis thinks and swallows. It’s hard to accept. For so many years, he’s thought of this as a dream so far out of his grasp that it didn’t even bear fantasising about. Now, here, it is right in front of him, and if he just reaches out, he can touch it with his own two hands. So he does.

He sits up and grasps Noct’s wrist, gently pries him away from his nether regions, and looks him in the eye. “Allow me to demonstrate.”

Noctis looks at him wide-eyed. As if that hasn’t even occurred to him. As if he honestly expected Ignis to simply keep his hands to himself when what he’s always wanted is so close and eagerly exploring his body.

“Y—you mean…”

“Yes, I mean,” Ignis teases him lovingly and cups his face in hands, presses a kiss to the side of it that he hopes will spread the warmth he feels inside to the prince. “Do you object?”

Noct exhales shakily, almost a chuckle, and closes his fingers around Ignis’ wrists, leaning into his touch. “Of course not.”

“You might be a man after all.”

“What did you think I was?” Noctis asks him, bemused, and allows himself to be propelled and pushed down against the mattress.

What, indeed? His master, his brother, his friend… His prince, his king, his charge, his responsibility, his love, his hope, his everything.

“Too far out of my reach to even think about, let alone act on,” he goes with, speaking the truth. “If I had considered you a man like all the others, I couldn’t say what I’d have done. Nothing to be proud of, to be certain.”

Noctis startles and turns an enticing shade of pink before he mumbles, “I wouldn’t have… _stopped_ you…”

“That hardly makes me feel better.” Truthfully, that’s the worst thought of all. That he could have acted on his impulses and the prince would have allowed it. The thought is so awful in its entirety, he doesn’t even know where to start. Corrupting a minor? Sullying the future King of Lucis? Betraying the trust of the _current_ King of Lucis, who had left his one and only son in his care, believing he was safe there? Taking advantage of a friend? Ruining his relationship with a brother? The possibilities are endless. Ignis knows; he’s thought about all of them for a rather large number of years.

“You didn’t want to?” Noctis asks curiously, seeing none of what Ignis had seen back then.

“Of course I wanted to. That’s what makes the thought so frightening.”

The prince doesn’t understand, but there’s no problem with that. He doesn’t need to. Many of the problems of that time have disappeared now, and Ignis has had almost a decade to get over his self-loathing—most prominent in the beginning stages of his realisation, when he started noticing things he knew he shouldn’t have and found his unwanted interest focused on none other than the prince himself. Perhaps it wouldn’t have been so bad, he thinks, if it hadn’t been Noct. He certainly never cared that he liked men. If it _only_ had been men. Liking the boy he was supposed to care for, however… That was hard to get over. Hard not to feel guilty for. Sometimes he still does.

Ignis smiles a little ruefully and trails a hand over Noct’s chest. What it would have felt like to have this be the first time, he wonders. If none of the other boys had touched him. He would be feeling like Noctis is now, and he’d be able to understand him even better for it. They’d share this moment of anxious excitement together. Make all the wrong moves and feel sheepish about it.

He’s never really regretted his past trysts before now. He’s never really felt much of anything about them, truth be told, but sitting here, looking down at Noctis, he feels a pang of remorse for what might have been. Even if it would have been infinitely less enjoyable for the prince with a less experienced partner. He’s feeling selfish like that.

Sighing, he shakes the thoughts off and focuses on the present. Dwelling on past errors won’t change what happened and will only distract him from what matters most: Noctis is here, beneath him, waiting to be ravished. And that he most certainly will.

“If you dislike any of it, just say the word and I’ll stop.”

The prince nods and he starts. He begins with light touches, expertly placed where he knows Noct will feel it the most, and eventually brushes over a nipple. Noctis gasps, covers his mouth with his hand looking stricken, and Ignis is painfully reminded that not only does the boy not know anything about intimacy between men, he’s also never been with a woman like this either. It should worry him. It should make him fret and withdraw, but all it does is make him even more eager to continue, to mark Noct as his and never let him slip from his grasp.

He’s never thought of himself as a possessive man, but he knows that that is nothing but a wilful lie he’s told himself to make it easier. There is nothing about him that doesn’t want to own, claim, or hold Noctis—with his explicit consent, of course—and there is not a single part of him that isn’t overflowing with satisfaction at being able to do so now. It’s the most shameful of his secrets. The most scandalous of his thoughts, and even given the position they’re in, Ignis sincerely hopes that Noctis will never discover any of this.

He leans down and presses a kiss to Noct’s neck, then another, while his hand sneaks under the shirt and pushes it up as far as it will go. The prince shivers.

“Noct?”

“Keep going.”

Ignis does. He takes his time tweaking the royal nipples, caressing and twisting the nubs until Noctis is squirming beneath him, silently asking for more. Then he takes one into his mouth and hears the prince above him audibly draw air.

“Shit.”

Ignis smirks. He’s never been particularly sensitive in that area himself, but he had an inkling Noct might like this. He’s glad to know he’s right.

While his mouth is busy teasing the chosen nipple, one of his hands sneaks lower, brushing tantalisingly against Noct’s waistband and forcing a frustrated groan out of the prince himself.

“All in due time,” Ignis tells him, insufferably smug, and makes good on his word. He’s never freed an erection so slowly from its confinements before, but he finds the reward for patience is worth it. Noctis is positively vibrating beneath him, annoyed and anxious and eager all at the same time as he glances up at Ignis with a look he’s never seen before. Somehow it is… heartrending.

His chest constricts tightly, and he swallows past a sudden lump in his throat. “I love you.”

He knows that, of course, and _has_ known it for years, but somehow it feels like it just hit him all over again, and he presses his face into the pillow next to Noct to cool off for a moment before he loses his head completely. What is he _thinking,_ doing this? What if Noctis decides he was wrong and never wants to do it again? What if all his worst fears come true and the prince treats him differently, coldly, now that he knows of his feelings? He couldn’t take it. If that were to happen, he… he doesn’t know what he would do. Despair entirely. Curse himself a fool and pray to still be useful in some manner. But if Noctis were to look at him the way the people whispering behind his back looked at him…

A sudden hand in his hair startles him out of his thoughts, and he twists his head enough to look into Noct’s displeased eyes.

“You’re too loud.”

“I wasn’t aware I’d said anything.”

The prince looks at him disapprovingly and tightens his grip until it’s a little painful. “Your thoughts. You’re making _me_ feel bad. I can hear them all the way over here.”

“Apologies. I didn’t think my _thinking_ would upset you,” Ignis says dryly and tries to pull away a little, but Noctis won’t have it.

“It does. So stop it.” He makes sure of that by forcing their lips together, holding Ignis prisoner until he’s noticeably relaxed against him. Then he says, with all the commanding tone of a royal who has no idea what he’s doing, “Keep going,” and pushes his body up in invitation. Ignis can’t exactly turn him down.

“As you wish.” It’s barely more than a whisper, but Ignis can’t manage more. He lets his body talk for him, turns his head to kiss Noct while his grip fastens around his dick and takes the prince’s breath away.

He takes it slow, both to prolong the encounter for his own selfish reasons and to ensure it will be a most pleasurable experience for his partner. If they are never to do this again, he at least wants this to be a cherished memory between them. It’s all he can allow himself to hope for.

When he’s come far enough to be breathing down Noct’s dick, he takes one last look up at the prince. He isn’t looking back, his eyes screwed shut, but Ignis takes it as the permission it is. He knows very well this can’t be easy. It wasn’t for him either, the first time.

Overcome with affection for his partner, he slowly closes his mouth around the erect member before him and pushes down. Noctis almost comes right there.

Ignis tries not to chuckle for fear the vibrations will truly set him off and stays still for a moment, allowing the prince to adjust to the feeling. He wants this to last long enough for Noct to get an idea of what this is like, what it _can_ be like, and how good it can feel. His reasons are of course entirely selfish: if Noctis enjoys this, he’s more likely to do it again. Sometimes his mind is very simple.

When it seems like Noct can take more, he starts to suck in earnest. Ignis knows he’s prone to the occasional bout of vanity, and he knows that’s due to good reason, so it isn’t difficult to feel smug when Noctis writhes beneath him, desperately trying to both avoid and chase after the sensations. Let’s just say he’s ‘confident in his skills’. Gods know he’s practiced them enough.

“Shit, I’m—“

Oh, Ignis knows. He could tell long before Noctis, and he makes his point by swirling his tongue in a way he knows will set him off. Then he waits patiently and indulges in the low groan escaping Noct’s throat while he spills into his mouth. He’d call this a success.

When he has swallowed all of it, he withdraws and lets Noct’s slowly softening dick slip from his mouth. By now he’s grown used to the taste, and it’s neither particularly great nor terrible. He _would_ prefer having a drink right after, but when he looks at the prince, he knows he cannot possibly move. Not when he’s lying there, spent, hiding his face behind his hands while his fingers dig into black hair.

Ah, yes. The shame. A classic.

“Noct.” He’s careful when he approaches, leaning over the prince without touching while he waits for a response. “Please look at me.”

He only gets a quick shake of a head. Of course.

“Noct.”

“I can’t.”

Ignis sighs and ruffles his hair from an awkward angle. In a way, he’s glad. It could have been _much_ worse, so he’ll happily take a shy Noctis over a disgusted one and count his blessings.

He tries to stand and get a glass of water at least, but something is holding onto his shirt and keeping him from leaving the bed. When he looks down, he sees that Noct has sacrificed one hand to cling to him in panic. It very nearly stops his heart.

“Don’t leave.”

That sounds like a very thoughtless joke. Where would he go? To do what? All he’s ever wanted is right here, clutching at him as if he’ll simply disappear without a moment’s notice.

“You wouldn’t be able to make me,” Ignis tells him frankly and settles in next to the prince. It’s the truth, and he makes sure Noctis knows that by carefully slipping an arm beneath his head and drawing him against his chest. He’s met with no resistance. Indeed, it’s quite the opposite: Noct immediately turns and hugs him tight, burying his head in his shirt like it’s the only thing keeping him breathing.

“How do you feel?”

There’s many things he wants to ask, such as ‘did you enjoy it?’ or ‘do you regret it?’, but none of them seem appropriate. What he really wants to know, what really matters, is all packed into this one question, and even though he’s scared to hear the answer, he simply _needs_ to know.

“Like you just sucked my brains out.”

Ignis laughs.

“That’s rather forward.”

“ _You’re_ rather forward,” Noct complains and squeezes his side. “Did you actually swallow that?”

“I did, yes.”

“Icky.”

He smiles a little, squinting down to make out the top of the prince’s head. “It’s not as bad as you imagine.”

“I don’t… really wanna know.”

That is probably the truth, and Ignis has never expected Noct to reciprocate anyway, so the revelation doesn’t hurt him. Actually, he’s already gotten what he wanted, and the prince probably doesn’t even realise it.

“There is no need to find out,” Ignis promises him softly and plants a kiss on his hair.

Noct tries to raise his head a little to look at him. “You don’t want me to…?”

“I’m rather comfortable at the moment. I would prefer to stay like this, if you’ve no objections.”

The prince exhales and buries his face in his chest, murmuring, “It’s fine. Whatever.” Ignis takes that as ‘I’d like that too.’

His arm around the younger man tightens, and he allows himself a moment to simply bask in his presence, the reassuring warmth of a body pressed against his and the unmistakable scent of his heart’s desire clouding his senses. Yes, there is truly nothing more he wishes for. Just to be able to hold him like this, all secrets bared, is more than he ever dared dream of. He doesn’t know where to go from here, that’s how unprepared he is for anything more, but it certainly helps to know that Noct is not entirely unwilling.

“Thank you.”

“It’s…” Noctis trails off, hesitates for a moment, and then squeezes him once. “…fine.”

 


End file.
